Mindchow from Vaidy

Kicking the Habit . . .

2009-04-02T16:41:00.000+05:30

This is one of my favourite topics ………. Parts of it have been liberally borrowed from the writings of Bro.Mike George, one of my favourite speakers with inputs from me ofcourse J

Kicking The Habit :

It is the most common daily mental activity. It is the greatest misuse of mental energy. It is a complete waste of time. And it may even kill. It’s called

worry . . . . . . .

It’s good to worry isn’t it? Worry shows you care doesn’t it? It means you are cleverly anticipating the future. . . . . yes? NO, NO and NO ! Worry is anxiety based on fiction. It is a series of negative thoughts which ‘disempowers’ the natural creativity of our consciousness, and it may eventually sabotage our physical digestive system. Why does worry thinking affect our digestive processes in particular? Perhaps it’s because when the fantasy of the catastrophe is held up against the light of reality, it is revealed for what it is, complete unreality, and is therefore hard to swallow!!!!! However, as we invest our belief in our home made stories of the worst possible outcome, we stimulate the overproduction of certain chemicals in our bodies.

Winston Churchill once said near the end of his life. “When I look back on all the words I have read, I remember the story of the main who said on his death bed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life that never happened”

So what is worry? It is the regurgitation of a negatively perceived past projected into the future. It is the dredging up of memories of hurt, rearranged into an imaginary tale of conflict or loss still to come.

And yet despite most people acknowledging worry as a waste of time and energy, it is still one of the most common lessons we learn from our parents!!!! The prevailing myth, which is handed down from generation to generation, is ‘it’s good to worry, it shows you care’. Which of course is utter nonsense!!!! Worry is fear and care is love, and fear and love are polar opposites. If you stop for a moment and become aware of why you worry about someone else you may also find it is motivated by selfishness – you are really worried for yourself. You are worried about how you will feel if something bad happens to someone else. In fact you are already feeling it!

Worry thinking is simply a learned habit, an addiction that is fed by a toxic daily diet of bad news, unfortunate events and tales of personal traumas of others. Don’t Worry Be Happy was the title of a hit song a few years ago. For many that is not easy, as worry has become a mental/emotional drug and just saying ‘be happy’ is a threat to that drug. Besides, many people think they are quite happy… worrying!!! Do you???

Worry is also a subtle avoidance of now. . . . . . It is an escape into a negative future so that the reality of the present does not have to be fully faced and dealt with now. And yet, we can only find peace here and now, we can only live with love here and now. We can only be fully present and available for others in the here and now. Worry is absence. To be free of the worry habit we may have to ask ourselves why we don’t want to be here now, why do we broadcast our run to the future and proudly stake our claim to be prophets of doom and clairvoyants of gloom????? There is much to be achieved in the power of now, in just being … … But then again its something which entirely depends on us. Are we ready and committed enough to live in ‘the now’ ??? or do we find easy escape by worrying about the future………

Some questions to ponder………………

Question : What percentage of your thoughts are worry thoughts and what percentage actually happen ? ? ? ?

Reflection : Don’t Worry Be Happy! ! ! – What is the difference between worry and happy – make notes consciously , what are the states of Happy mind / worried mind . . .

Action : At the end of the day today make a simple list of all things you worried about, then next to each item write down what you will actually do to tackle that ‘worry’. . . .

Be.......Do .......... Have......

2009-03-05T22:43:00.001+05:30

Today while checking mails came across these lovely words by Margaret Young ………… "Often people attempt to live their lives backwards: they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you love to do, in order to have what you want."
My own ‘churning’ on this led me along this path ……………… The formula for success is Be, Do, Have. If we seek abundance, we must be abundant in spirit. We can begin to cultivate spiritual wealth by opening our hearts in gratitude.
Start a gratitude journal today. Each evening, write down at least 5 things for which you are grateful. This simple tool will help you open your eyes to the abundance of your world right now. ( This has certain connection to one of my earlier posts too …. )
Finally - "Who does not thank for little will not thank for much."!!!!!!

Savings Pass Book......

2009-01-28T22:43:00.000+05:30

Saving Passbook
Riya married Santosh this day ( 1st Jan XXXX ) . At the end of the wedding party, Riya’s mother gave her a newly opened bank saving passbook. With Rs.1000 deposit amount.
Mother: ‘Riya , take this passbook. Keep it as a record of your marriage (married) life. Whenever something happy and memorable happens in your new life, put some money in. Write down what it’s about next to the line.
The more memorable the event is, the more money you can put in. I’ve done the first one for you today. Do the others with Santosh. When you look back after years, you can know how much happiness you’ve had.’
Riya shared this with Santosh when getting home. They both thought it was a great idea and were anxious to know when the second deposit can be made.
This was what they did after certain time:
- 7 Feb: Rs.100, first birthday celebration for Santosh after marriage
- 1 Mar: Rs.300, salary raise for Riya
- 20 Mar: Rs.200, vacation trip to Bali
- 15 Apr: Rs.2000, Riya got pregnant
- 1 Jun: Rs.1000, Santosh got promoted
…… and so on…
However, after some years, like most couples they also started fighting and arguing for trivial things. They didn’t talk much. They regretted that they had got married at all.……..no more love….…Kind of typical nowadays, huh?
One day Riya talked to her Mother: ‘Mom, we can’t stand it anymore. We agree to divorce. I can’t imagine how I decided to marry this guy!!!’
Mother: ‘Sure, dear, that’s no big deal. Just do whatever you want if you really can’t stand it. But before that, do one thing first. Remember the saving passbook I gave you on your wedding day? Take out all money and spend it first. You shouldn’t keep any record of such a poor marriage.’
Riya thought it was true. So she went to the bank , planning to use up and cancel the account. While she was waiting, she took a look at the passbook record. She looked, and looked, and looked. Then the memory of all the previous joys and happiness came flooding to her mind. Her eyes were then filled with tears. She left and went home. On reaching home, she handed the passbook to Santosh in the evening after he came from Office, asked him to spend the money before getting divorce.
The next day, Santosh gave the passbook back to Riya. She found a new deposit of Rs.5000. And a line next to the record: ‘This is the day I notice how much I’ve loved you thru out all these years. How much happiness you’ve brought me.’ They hugged and cried, putting the passbook back to the safe.
Do you know how much money they had saved when they retired? I did not ask.I believe the money did not matter any more after they had gone thru all the good years in their life.
“When you fall, in any way, Don’t see the place where you fell, Instead see the place from where you slipped……….. Life is about correcting mistakes.”

AMRIT VELA / NECTAR TIME

2009-01-26T19:04:00.000+05:30

Amrit Vela / Nectar Time is the name given to the early morning hours, when the whole world’s asleep….
Those who have experienced the truth of that time know the importance of nectar time very well.
Spiritual aspirants like sages of yore and even our brethren from all religions have always known the value of Amrit Vela in their spiritual progress only too well, having in most cases experienced it firsthand. Why is Amrit Vela so important / significant??
1. The atmosphere at that time is free of pollution – mental…………physical……… noise…………. In all the senses…..
2. More importantly,THE POWERHOUSE……..BESTOWER of all powers and virtues is waiting to welcome us, his children with open arms and bestow his choicest blessings and treasures on those of us who are awake, aware and conscious at that time.

I have been fortunate to have some wonderfully empowering and fulfilling experiences during Amrit Vela.

However the Nectar time is the time of nectar only if we fill ourselves with nectar. The easiest and best way to do it is to look inwards. Playing with the imperishable jewels of knowledge is one way of filling ourselves to the brim during this auspicious time……….

Gratitude Register

2009-01-06T23:27:00.000+05:30

The concept of maintaining a gratitude register was suggested to me by a good friend of mine, Suresh Padmanabhan, who conceptualised “The Money Workshop” (www.moneyworkshop.com)
The concept deeply appealed to me because of its simplicity and also its significance which it has to our lives.
During our entire lifetime, we are indebted to a lot of people who in their own inimitable manner have contributed in our lives. It could be our school teacher, the friendly gardener, our first “best” friend, our parent(s), sibling(s), mentor, spouse, subordinate or………………. ……………………………. Now a days our online friend(s)…..
Gratitude register is essentially a record of the people and things whom we are grateful for and the manner in which they or it have contribution in our lives. All those who have contributed to what and where we are today. It could also include those who kicked us when we were down, because that acted as the catalyst for us to bounce back faster.
Gratitude register helps us to record and acknowledge the contribution of various people in our life. The human memory with all its frailities …………….. and strong points is fickle to say the least. While most people bear grudges which last a lifetime, normally the “good things” tend to be taken for granted. Especially from those close to us and our loved ones. Their presence and contribution in our life is taken for granted. It is only a prolonged absence which makes us realize the difference they make to our lives. If you want to know this first hand, typically ask a husband when his wife goes visiting her parents for ten days…….. J
In fact, on a lighter note the one person whom most of my cousins missed the most after shifting to the US of A, post marriage , was the friendly “kaamwali bai” . It just goes to show to what extent we tend to take most things in life for granted. In the US of A, you do not get a domestic help even if you are willing to pay a handsome salary/remuneration. We normally realize the value of normalcy in our lives only when something abnormal happens, for ex having an accident in the kitchen while cooking and cutting our finger and then struggling to do even the routine chores makes us realize the extent to which we had been taking our ‘normalcy’ for granted…………………and so on………..

Be For, Not Against……………………..

2009-01-06T23:23:00.000+05:30

Everything you are against, weakens you, Everything you are for, empowers you……… - Wayne Dyer
Shift your focus on what you desire, rather than what is missing/or what you do not want.
This is truly an empowering thought ………………..
The best example of this can be brought out by the story of Mother Teresa. During the Vietnam War, a group of people approached Mother Teresa and asked her whether she would join them in a march to protest against the war. Mother Teresa’s reply was I will not join you in a march to protest against the war, however I will gladly join you in case you would like to march for peace…….. This thought reveals the the type of personality that Mother Teresa was. The quality of that soul. No wonder then that she is practically venerated........

Acknowledgements......

2009-01-06T23:21:00.000+05:30

Any project or accomplishment requires the input / efforts of many …. And this blog is no different…..
I thank the Supreme whom we variously refer to as GOD, Ishwar, Allah, Jehovah, Bhagwan, Shiva …. along with the very many well wishers who have inspired me and also in some manner contributed to the matter in this blog.
Many examples,stories,anecdotes,quotes are the result of collection from various sources such as newpapers,books,speakers/writers in seminars/conferences over the past several years. Unfortunately the sources were not always noted or available for noting, hence it became impracticable to provide an accurate acknowledgement. Regardless of the source, I wish to express my gratitude to those who may have contributed to inputs in this blog, even though anonymously.
Every effort has also been made to give credit where it is due for the inputs at various stages.